Vegas Bike Fest Bitches!

Well so far, Vegas has been an absolute blast.  We planned on leaving real early to beat the heat but Diane had to work all day and I could not even finish packing the bike until she got home.  First bump in the road.  Second bump, Phoenix rush hour traffic, 103 degrees going traffic light to traffic light.  The heat was frying us and all I could think about was the old drug ad, "this is your brain, this is your brain on a Harley in bumper to bumper traffic"!  Once we finally got moving, the stress of the day, the traffic and business peeled away with each passing mile and as the spectacular sun set behind the mountains, we were back to being ourselves.

I always keep my phone turned off when I take road trips to save the battery in case something happens.  With our original plan to arrive in Vegas by 1pm the latest, when I turned on the phone, it was filled with messages from fb, voice mail and texts from people who were worried about us and message after message about getting our asses down to Hogs!  It seemed that EVERYONE was at Hogs already.  It was like walking into a reunion as we got there.  It was nearly overwhelming, in each and every direction that we turned, there was someone that we hadn't seen in a real long time.  The fact that Diane was with me proved to many that she is not really a figment of my imagination.  It is so funny that people who have never met her, absolutely adore her because they have learned so much about her from my sharing so openly our lives with the world. 

 We finally decided to go inside the bar, get a drink and say hello to Ms. Michelle, el jeffe of Hogs!  The last thing Diane said as we left the hotel was, "grab my license, don't forget"....  well I forgot!  So as we stood at the door, exhausted from the trip, I handed the door man my i.d. and proceeded to tell him that I forgot Diane's.  I asked him, "hey man, I left hers in the room, can she still get in"?  I'm friends with Michelle, does that help?  He laughed and said, I only hear that 200 times a day.  So I told him that on the 201st, it was true.  Then I asked, does it help any that I work for Cycle Source and he said well hell yeah, that helps a lot!  With that, Michelle came screaming through the door, damn near knocking this wall of a man aside, wrapped her arms around me, then Diane and I looked at the door man and winked.... he laughed and said "201st times a charm"!  Since Wednesday, we've more or less spent all of our time that we've not been in bed, down at Hogs!  We did run down to Cashman Center to pick up our media passes and we were lucky enough to catch the Artistry In Iron show and the level of the bikes were incredible. 

I don't have any pics as I want to leave that as a surprise for you all in upcoming issues of EVERY major bike mag out there!  Stellar scoots, amazing people and an awesome spread of food for all left nothing to be desired, it was all TITS!  Then afterwards, you guessed it, straight back to Hogs!  I could go on and on, but I won't.  I just wanted to keep you guys up to date on our trip so far.

The big news that has come out of this trip is my return to STAND UP COMEDY.  It's been nearly 15 months since I've performed straight stand up and I have to say, I'm nervous as hell and wonder how I get myself into this shit?  So tonight, at the 4 Queens Casino on Freemont Street, the Real Vegas to me, Bag Lady Sue and I will take to the Stage at 9 pm.  If you are in town, c'mon down, if your friends are here, let them no.  I've not really had any time to let people know this was going on!  Wish me luck!

Until we see each other again on the road,

Keep the wind in your face,
Tits in your back
and The Man Off Your ASS!

Your Friend,
Jack Shit