I rolled it out of the garage, clicked the choke up halfway, advanced the timing and that 70 year old bike fired on the very first kick! I let it get up to running temperature, sat on the seat, stepped on the clutch and it DIED! Son of a bitch! Got off it, kicked it over, fired it up, sat on the seat and it DIED! Mother fucker! It sounded like it was starving for gas and I knew the gas in the tank was very low so I began to look and look and look for the petcock! WHERE THE HELL IS THE PETCOCK? Is it possible that it doesn't have one? I can't seem to find one. I'm kicking and kicking and kicking and now there is nothing! Got a nice bright headlight so I know I have power, what in the hell is going on? The house sits on top of a very high hill so now I have a flash of genius, I'll put it in second, roll it down the hill and bump start it, all good, no problem! Well it would be no problem if the engine was getting any gas! So once again, it fired up, I rode it 25 feet and it promptly DIED! THERE IS NO PUSHING IT BACK UP THE HILL, this I know for sure. Finally I call and tell him what is going on. He asks, did you open the petcock? WHERE IS THE FUCKING PETCOCK? Oh, that's a petcock? Who'da thunk it? If the engine gets gas, the engine will run! Now the thrilling, amazing, inches added to my penis just pulling down the driveway ride began! Off I went. Now I've never ridden a three speed, rocker clutch, tank shift bike in my life, how hard can it be? Actually, not hard at all. Got her off the mountain, down the hill and filled with gas and off I rode. Luckily, the lil woman was in the car and she was able to capture a few shots for posterity!
Holy Sweet 4lb 7oz Baby Jesus was it bad assed!
All I could think of the entire ride was "oh God, please don't let anything happen, please don't let anything happen"! As I crossed the intersection of Guadalupe and Ellsworth Roads, some stupid bitch, on the phone with a car load of kids made a fast left across 6 lanes and cut right in front of me. I THOUGHT IT WAS OVER FOR BOTH MYSELF AND THE BIKE! At the very last moment, she saw me, slammed on the brakes, then punched the gas and then finally jammed on the brakes again and stopped right in the middle of the intersection! It took approximately 2 miles before my balls returned to their original location in my nut sack! They were somewhere near the base of my throat I believe! At least that is the last place that I felt them rise to. Every single car, truck or bike that went past me spun their necks like their heads were going to come off when they seen her going down the road. At each light that I stopped at, someone would roll down the window and ask me what year it was and with big smiles say "my God, it's amazing"! I've gotten this a lot while riding the knuckle but I've never seen anything like this. What blew me away were the old timers. It's what we call here in AZ, SNOWBIRD season and we got lots and lots of old fuckers running the roads. The look on their faces as I rolled up next to them at traffic lights spoke volumes. That bike going down the road today brought back a flood of memories for a few old guys in pick up trucks with Army stickers in the windows and on the bumpers and I got to be part of it!
hey, if you don't want to ride it and just be a bitch, well, I'm okay with that"! This bike here!
In our life, a tremendous amount of bad has happened and Diane and I have survived a great deal and no matter what, we've always pushed forward. Countless times, I've thought to myself and I've even asked aloud, when will things get better? We've dedicated our lives to keeping 100% perfect Karma and are just waiting for it to come back around. I've come to realize that it's not the "things" we get in return or get back, that is our good Karma coming back on us, but the very people who have come in to our lives and share their time with us! The kindness, the generosity, the support and THE LOVE that these people share with us, that right there is our COSMIC REWARD! That right there is our Karma coming back to us! Every now and again, friends talk about the fantasy of winning the lottery and I always say, "I never play, I never buy tickets"! I'd never put too much thought in to it and when I did, I just figured our luck is so shitty and so bad that we would never have a chance to win, so why waste the dollar to play? More and more lately though, I realize, that we've already WON THE LOTTERY! We are surrounded by the most amazing people that anyone could ever wish to be surrounded by. Of course a scumbag, a user, a rat, a liar or a flat out fake fuck will sneak through the cracks but they are quickly found out and cut loose. Most times we are no worse off then before that trash entered our lives. On occasion, unfortunately we are and those are the lessons in life that you learn from. It also helps you to realize just how amazing the "real" people in your life are! So even though at times, we may be a couple of broke bitches, we are extremely wealthy where it counts and we are blessed!
For those of you who we share our time with, who we make those memories with and with whom we look forward to a future with, all I can say from the bottom of my heart is "you guys were our winning powerball ticket"! Thank you for all you do and for who you are!
Until we see each other on the road again,
Keep the wind in your face,
Tits in your back
and The Man off your Ass!