It's been a good ride so far!

Since I was just a kid all I have ever wanted to do was to make people laugh or just smile. As a child, an educator sent a note home to my parents. It read; If your son thinks he is going to get through life making people laugh he is in for a RUDE AWAKENING! He is not living up to his potential. WELL, I'M STILL NOT! But at this site you will at least see me try. From the heart, thank you for even being interested, it means the world to me. I always say, I have not a single fan but many a friend!



Sunday, February 6, 2011

The Event Invite Said Shitty Art Show



...... and it didn't lie!  This weekend I was able to sneak away down to Tombstone, Arizona to help support a dear friend when he opened the doors of his Shitty Studio to the world.  The hard packed dirt of 4th Street in Tombstone has seen more blood spilled on it than many entire cities have.  Now on that very street between Toughnut and Allen Streets a new senseless tragedy has occurred!  My friend George the Painter has moved in and opened shop!  For the very first time in his career he has managed to amass an entire wall's length of GTP originals and in all in one location at the same time, it may not happen again for all of eternity.  That is because come 2012 we're all dead anyway right?  The location so amazing only a town like Tombstone could host the dirt bags, street urchin's, whack jobs and misfits that passed through the door of the studio on Saturday. 
I pulled up to the building to immediately see all kinds of no good characters milling about and a smile crept across my mouth.  Fantastic, George is getting a good turnout.  Well why wouldn't he you may be thinking?  Well for the first time in a great many years, thanks to La Nina', a wicked Mexican bitch, WINTER HIT ARIZONA!  On the rare occasion that it does, it comes like a bitch slap from God!   Just a little reminder of who's in charge.  I had to park 5 blocks away from the studio as the town was packed.  A few of the hardcore knuckled up and rode the average distance of 200 miles to this Shitty Show.  You know who you are!  Some quite frankly rode the rubber off the tires to get there. 


Like I said you see all kinds of folks walking the streets of Tombstone and nearly all of them still alive.  As I approached the studio I walked straight into Curly Bill Brocious, one of the most well known Bad Asses to ever raise holy hell here in town.  He was known for being insane fast on the draw but a notoriously bad shot so I had no choice but to grab that Smoke Wagon before he had a chance to skin it.  That's a Tombstone the Movie Reference!  Much to my surprise though, I was not the only one impressed with this fine cowboy.  One of the lovely ladies of Tombstone just could not resist, you know what they say, LADIES LOVE OUTLAWS right?

This Shitty art show wasn't looking so Shitty after all and I hadn't even made it off of the sidewalk yet.  I couldn't wait to get inside.  Once I crossed the threashold from reality to insanity I knew that George meant business and nothing but business when I saw what was hands down, the Shittiest Buffet that I have ever had the pleasure to dig into.  Maybe it wasn't Shitty enough for you, but it was certainly Shitty enough for me and it fit right into the "Theme" of the show.  Maybe I'm not being fair, you judge for yourself.


Ritz Crackers, squeeze Cheeeeze and some type of lips and assholes packaged in skin, matched wonderfully with both Pink and Blue Boone's Farm Wine.....  I told you it was Shitty!  It was perfect!

 I have had the pleasure of getting to not only see more GTP paintings than any human should but I have seen them through the process and it is an amazing sight.  But to see them all lined up against a 140 year old wall was totally surreal.  What a sight, what an accomplishment.  Although there were several portraits there, which I believe capture people like I've never seen before there were two originals, total originals and they were spectacular.  I won't post full up shots of the paintings here as that is not really for me to do, but I did manage to still capture fantastic shots for you to see.  The first original was a tribute to every American Soldier who has given the ultimate sacrifice, his life, on the battlefield and it is moving.



The next original which was not complete but a twisted masterpiece in progress was a piece aptly named
"when the Monkey shines".  I must tell you that although there is absolutely nothing graphic in the painting whatsoever, this painting is so disturbing to look at.  Comment after comment were the same, you didn't want to look at it, you consciously tried not to, but you had to look back in the corner just to make sure she hadn't jumped from the canvas and was coming to sleep over at your place for the night, truly horrifying.  There is no question that he captured the sheer lunacy of his subject.


To say that an eclectic mix attended the event would be like saying Illegal Drug Dealers are just amateur pharmacists.  It was just not entirely accurate.  He had cowboys, he had drunk pretend cowboys, he had tweakers, he had French Canadians which I personally dragged off of the street and inside and an entire gaggle of Fine Art for White Trash lovers.  The event scheduled from noon to six p.m. ended for the last of us around 4:30 a.m..  Here are just a few shots that I captured as the evening progressed and madness ensued.  I wish that I could post them all but I can't.  I have already been banned in the Middle East, don't want to get banned in the USA too.



Below is a shot of Curly Bill or as we call him Brother Porn checking out the Arizona Hwys mag that he was quoted in.  It was a special edition of 50 great weekend getaways in Arizona, I believe he is in trip number 30.  Check it out while on line at the grocery store next time.



All that I can say is this, IT AIN'T A PARTY TILL YOU ALL PLAY STRIP 9 BALL WITH A NUN!

OR.... until the girls start kissing.  Then you know that you have achieved something.


Nearing the first attempt at ending the night you could see the look of accomplishment on our faces.  We survived George the Painters first Shitty Art Show!


and of course you know it was a good time when someone finally has to pee in a garbage can.

I will say this to you my friends.  If you have never had the opportunity to check out the work in oil of this great artist and bike community treasure then make the time to do it, find a way to do it and if you have the means order a portrait while he is still considering painting them.  The weekend was fantastic, the show kick ass and the people just what you would expect from the Town Too Tough To Die!  Get on your bikes and ride on down to Tombstone.  GTP also assured me that his deal is still on for bikers.  If you ride your bike down to his studio he will give you a discount on your painting, now how can you beat that shit?  Basically getting paid to ride your bike.  When you get there, go in the door quietly or you will get screamed at, but by all means, go through that door and you make sure that you tell George that your friend JACK SHIT sent you and you read about his work at Jack Shit's World.  He will probably give you an extra hard kick in the ass!  Hey, I never claimed him to be a great humanitarian, just a great artist! 

I want to thank George the Painter for having us all down to his sacred studio and for being an exceptional friend.  You have surprised me much Grasshopper!  They say that life is art, so go live it large and create great works.  Till I see you on the road again, I am Jack Shit and I remind you to KEEP THE WIND IN YOUR FACE, TITS IN YOUR BACK AND THE MAN OFF YOUR ASS!  Live each day BIG, it may be your last!

2 comments:

  1. I'm glad it was just as shitty as it promised to be!

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  2. oh Laura, it was even shittier than expected, quite possibly the shittiest art show I have ever seen! I hope there are more of them!

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