It's been a good ride so far!

Since I was just a kid all I have ever wanted to do was to make people laugh or just smile. As a child, an educator sent a note home to my parents. It read; If your son thinks he is going to get through life making people laugh he is in for a RUDE AWAKENING! He is not living up to his potential. WELL, I'M STILL NOT! But at this site you will at least see me try. From the heart, thank you for even being interested, it means the world to me. I always say, I have not a single fan but many a friend!



Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Starting to polish up our little Gem

On the 15th I believe, I posted up about a property that we are deeply involved in the purchase, renovation and hopefully soon, the re sale of.  I was blown away by how much interest you guys showed in it.  In that original post I told you all that I would keep you up to date on the progress of the property and show you what a little bit of imagination, elbow grease and a hammer can do with an old foreclosed home.  Today we took a trip up to the doctor and stopped by the property to check up on how it was coming along.  Right now about 80% of the demolition is complete and the prep work is being done to prepare for finish materials.  Not only has the home taken on a drastic appearance change from the curb but once through the door it has become unrecognizable from its former self!  Well, here, check it out.

Here is a shot of what the exterior looked like when first acquired.
The exterior was refinished with masonry product and is now stucco which
is traditional here in Arizona and will be painted earth tone.


Over the years it seems that the kitchen more or less grew with the family.  There was no real thought that went in to it it seems.  A cabinet was added here and there and there was a built in "china cabinet" that must have been hard to move so they literally built around it.  Very strange!  There was tile in some spots, carpet in others and spots where three different types of tile met up with no real transition, they just came together.
Take a look at this shit!

When you entered the home and looked towards the kitchen this was how it appeared.  By this time we had already chopped up all or most of the flooring.  You can see the smoke rising from Diane's brain working over time.  This was the moment she decided that "THIS KITCHEN MUST GO"!
.....and here is the very same shot and how it appeared today!  One hell of a big difference isn't it?  Don't worry, that crazy oak railing is not going in the kitchen but rather it is replacing the shit ass home made rail outside on the small front patio and entry. 
Here was a view looking from the kitchen towards the front door.  It truly is night and day!

Once Diane gets on that job site and begins cracking that whip, work finally gets done!  She paces like a lioness and the workers suddenly become like gazelles.  Suddenly, siesta time is over!  Check out the difference now!

All of the flooring in the main living area has been removed, the cabinets, the appliances, that old china cabinet and even the walls have been taken down.  I can't wait to see the design that she has for the new kitchen.  She is amazing in her vision for these properties.  Let me show you another view of what this mish mosh of a kitchen had grown in to, it was truly horrible.  Just look at how they built around the cabinet!
.... and take a look at the very same space now with the cabinets out and the walls removed.

In Arizona, they say that the biggest room in your home is your back yard!  We average around 350 days of sunshine here per year.  The old saying here is 9 months of heaven for 3 months of HELL!  Those 3 months are our summer and all you need is some A/C in the house and a pool in the yard and life don't get any better.  The bigger the back patio, the happier the family!  This home had an average sized screened in patio with a few makeshift windows and a swamp cooler.  Over the years, walls were built and small prison cell like rooms were added along the back of the home.  What the hell is the sense in having a big beautiful back yard with a pool and a hot tub and you can't even see the damn things?  I made the command decision that the patio bar would stay!  ARE YOU SHOCKED?  But I also made the decision that the entire back of the home would come off!  This home was going to have one big, beautiful patio for the new owners to enjoy!  Here is what it looked like when we got this joint!


As of today, this has all come down!  The exterior walls have been removed, the windows and screen are gone for good.  No more prison cell!  As I said, of course the bar had to stay but the rest is history.  What was a 16' patio is now about 36' and it will all be open right to the pool and spa!



As you can see, THE BAR HAS REMAINED!  How can you enjoy your backyard without a place to make margaritas?  Once again, Diane obviously rocking her construction pumps is cracking the whip again!  As far as the rest of the property goes, the bathrooms will be gutted and those silly one piece shower stalls will be pulled out and the showers will be all done in tile.  Every nail hole will be filled, every single flaw in the will be made perfect and new flooring will be installed throughout.  The home also features a two car garage that was converted years ago in to one huge family room.  The only problem was that the room was so dark and so dreary.  In the middle sat a wood burning stove which will soon find its new home on MY PATIO.  There is a big ass closet that will be ripped out we've converted a room that I have no idea the original purpose that it served in to a huge pantry and laundry room.  First things first though, we had to make that room more inviting and get some natural light in it so we blew out the center of the front wall and framed in a big ass window.
This was how it looked before with all of the lights on and the camera flash going off!
There is nothing like adding natural light to a once dark and miserable space! 
Yes, that is the stove that will be going out on my back patio.  I have a separate patio all lined
up for this bad boy to be placed!  Can ya feel the romance?


So now you guys know a little bit more about what we do with our time when we are not riding those crazy murder sickles around the country and I'm not on stage entertaining or sitting on the ol' lap top and writing crazy shit for you all to read!  For those of you who did not see the previous piece about the story of this home, how we came about our involvement with it and so on, than I'll hit you with a brief recap.  My amazing wife, Diane is hands down, the very best realtor that I have ever seen!  She is so good that nearly every client that she has ever gotten a home for has referred their family and friends back to Diane to purchase their own home.  With the real estate market being so volatile these days and with all of the foreclosed properties, you need a very knowledgeable agent on your side and as I said before, SHE IS THE BEST I'VE EVER SEEN!  Back in the day, we use to find investment properties for friends and clients and turned them all in to real estate moguls before we began doing it for ourselves as well.  So flipping homes is in our DNA!  These days, Diane's client base is nearly all investors and most of those fine folks are coming down from Canada because their market is still exceptional up there and they are buying down here in Arizona.  We've made so many Canadian friends now and have done so much business with them over the last few years that we are practically honorary Canadians.  Now if they would just let me cross the damn border we could actually go and visit them too!

So as I promised, I'll keep you up to date on the progress of this property, as crazy as it seems right now, we are not really all that far from finishing this home.  I can guarantee one thing, this home will be beautiful when we are done and a lucky family is going to have a great place to call their own and either raise a family or have one hell of a vacation house!  So if you are interested in finding out more about the insane deals that are going on down here, please don't think twice about hitting Diane or myself up with those questions.  As much as I love to make people laugh and smile, Diane loves to find people homes of their very !  If not for you and you know someone else who is thinking about something like this, have them reach out to us.  THE ONLY STUPID QUESTION IS ONE THAT IS NOT ASKED!

Until we see each other on the road again,

Keep the wind in your face,
Tits in your back
and The Man off your ass!

Your friend,
Jack Shit


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