Lives are still being lost at the OK Corral!

The location of quite possibly the most famous gunfight in history was also the location for two dear friends to give their lives this past weekend as well.   Their single lives at least!  What seems like forever ago, perhaps it was on New Year's day, my dear friends Porn and Ilise asked if I would perform their wedding ceremony.  How could I not?  I have seen so many great couples that have thrown it all away by getting married but this was not the first for either of one of them so I figured they knew best!  Normally I at least try to talk a couple out of getting married.  I use every argument I can to do it too!  Now you are probably thinking, how does a guy who is with his girl for nearly 26 years bash marriage?  Why would you try to talk people out of what you are so happy with?  The answer to that is very simple.  I like to hear them defend the idea of why they are getting married.  The harder they fight, the better the chance that it will work out and the deeper the love.  Ya get it now?  IT'S A TRICK!

I've been going pretty hard since August and Sturgis and September was not much different.  I have events, weddings and rallies booked for each and every single weekend and I am bouncing from town to town and state to state.  Along with performing, writing and the other silly things I do with my life, I've also been, as you know, involved in the renovation work on yet another property.  Of all the things that I've been up to, you would think being involved in the bike world would be the most dangerous part of it all right?  Running helmetless at 100 mph would surely lead to disaster at worst or a few real good injuries at the least.  Walking in to the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong people and there is always the chance you may not be walking out!  Hell, living in the city where I live now, there is the chance of getting hurt in a mugging or hit by a drunk driver.  None of that has happened to me yet but I did get hurt pretty bad.  I got hurt how most hardcore rigid chopper riders get hurt real bad............  moving boxes of tile!  I twisted the wrong way as I was picking up a box of 18" tile and literally heard my back pop like bubble wrap!  I was frozen in place, still bent over, still holding the box of tile and I could not move!  I had hoped that within a day or two it would ease up and I could make the ride down to Tombstone or as I call it, Doombstone!  Well that didn't happen and I only got worse and worse as the days led up to the wedding.  This was nearly the very first wedding that I ever cancelled out on but I could not, I gave my word!  I could not only NOT ride a bike, I could not sit on a toilet, I was a mess!  I was screwed and then our hero entered the picture, GTP and his PIMP BLIMP saved the day!

I never thought that I would hear myself say this, hell, much less ever hear anyone else ever say it, but here it is; THANK GOD FOR GEORGE THE PAINTER!  There, I said it.  Sure a little bit of bile shot up in the back of my mouth as I said it but the burning in the back of my throat was worth it!  GTP showed up early in the morning, helped me load my shit in to the Pimp Blimp and got it all set up to carry a crippled ass Minister the 200 miles down to Doombstone!  It's not often, as a matter of fact it is actually quite rare that if I am in a cage that I am not the one driving.  I like to be in control and being a passenger makes me tense to say the least.  This could very well be the first time that I've ever been in a vehicle with George driving so I had no idea of his skills.  Every ripple in the road, each bump and each time the brakes were applied it was like being tasered!  My knee was blown out and my sciatic nerve was electrocuting me!  I thought I was going to just plain pass out.  Pain killer and muscle relaxers, one after the other like M&M's were the only thing that helped me make it through the ride down.  All that I could think of was getting out of that car!  The pills kicked in, I found a comfy position with pillows, braces and ice packs and a little Kid Rock on the cd player and I was relaxing.  Being a passenger is kind of cool, you get to see things you normally wouldn't.  You get to capture those things on camera that otherwise you wouldn't be able to.  For example;

Since I had the camera out, I figured I may as well capture the trip for posterity so I turned it on George and myself.  So we are driving 90 mph in a 75 ft. long wagon and I start snapping away.  I couldn't turn my hips, I couldn't turn my head and I could barely lift my arms.  I snapped a pic to see how it would line up and was stunned when I realized this car had a very special feature!

The Pimp Blimp has a rear sun roof!  Who knew?  I guess this was meant to help keep the kids quiet long before dvd players and video games were in each of the head rests!  Had I not taken this picture, I would have never known it was there!  This luxury vehicle has now grown even more luxurious!  Since I was taking pics, I had to capture the driver passenger shot.  I didn't think I would be able to get us both in but sure as shit I could.  Because of the horrible spasms in my back, it took two or three shots to get just the right one.  Now picture me, shaking like a junkie who is 2 days without a fix and GTP looking at the camera and smiling, but we are on the 10 in Arizona, one of the most busy and dangerous roads in the country as you can witness by looking at the news from yesterday of the multiple, 20+ car wrecks.  So here we are flying down the highway, me snapping away and us laughing like fucktards when just as I hit the shutter we realize that the Jeep Cherokee in front of us has all but come to a stop.  You can all but see it in his face!

You are probably thinking "hey, wait, I thought you said George was driving"?  He was!  The phone has two cameras.  One is forward and the other rear.  I never realized that the rear camera shoots backwards until this day when I started getting all kinds of crazy messages. 

After a quick stop at Wendy's for lunch and the hardware store for dog food, yes, that is what I said, don't ask, it is just how it works down there I guess, we rolled on in to Doombstone!  I guess in the town that is too tough to die, somethings just never change.  I had not been there since Jan. 1st of this year and as we pulled in to the Circle K store, I am pretty sure that the very same people were waiting on line.  Not that they were the same customers, I mean they were still waiting on the very same line as they were 10 months ago.  Service at the Circle K is well, FUCKING SLOW to say the very least!  As we turned in to the Porn compound, we could see all of the folding chairs nicely lined up along the property for wedding guests to sit and relax on.  Of course as we drove in, George promptly crashed in to and drove over them at high speed.  It was really funny to everyone but me because he had to slam on the brakes to keep from crashing in to the building and the pain that it caused me was indescribable!  For the record though, it was funny as shit!

As you can see in the video, the home on the Porn Compound is bad ass to say the least.  Well that is if you are in to history!  I believe the home was built in the 1880's and the home that shares the property is even older.  We arrived just shy of two hours prior to ceremony start time.  I had been so busted up in the days leading up to it that I had not written any ceremony for them at all.  I had taken the time to put down some bullet points as they popped in to my head while working on other projects.  I had my usb storage device plugged in at the time and didn't realize that when I hit save to each of the projects that I was working on saved to that device.  Of course that storage device was sitting on my desk at home, 200 miles away.  So now it's a little more than an hour before scheduled start time and we have no wedding ceremony.  I hopped to it, wrote from the heart and managed to put together what I believed to be beautiful.  All we had to do was print it out and head over to the wedding.  NOT SO EASY!  The printer would not work with my computer.  The only way to make it work was to print wireless.  The problem with that was that we had to steal the ac adapter from the wireless router to power up the printer.  No wireless printing now either.  We are now 22 minutes from start time.  We burned it to disc and put it in Ilise's lap top, opened it up and files "unreadable".  18 minutes to go, no ceremony!  By the grace of God, we got it to print and saved the day.  I ran outside, took another pain killer, sucked down half a jack and coke and we raced over to the OK Corral!  Needless to say, the bride to be was running a bit late.  By now I was on my feet for a while and just plain thought I would drop, walking with a cane and all. Brother Porn and I waited and waited and then!

 Finally, I heard the crowd on the bleachers moving and then a collective, AHHHHH!  With that, the bridal party began to enter this sacred property!  The one and only GTP gave our bride away along with lil Brayden and they all looked great!

I've got to say that the entire bridal party looked great.  Now it was time to gather them all together and let the madness begin!  I've always called Porn my brother and Ilise my sister so about 3 minutes in to the ceremony it dawned on me.  I began to speak about how touched and honored I was to perform both my brother's and my sister's wedding.... I just never thought that I would be marrying my brother to my sister?  Oh well, after all, it is Tombstone!  I don't think anyone would care and more so, not even sure anyone would notice!

So if there is anyone here who has any reason whatsoever to object to this couple being married here today, SHUT YOUR MOUTH, KEEP IT TO YOURSELF, NOBODY WANTS TO HEAR FROM YOU!

The ceremony progressed and as I looked down on my friends, I could see the love in their eyes and the joy on their faces and it touched me.  I was honored and humbled to have been asked to be part of this incredible day and if but for a brief few minutes, my pain went away!  When you look down and see a friend with this kind of smile on her face, how can you feel anything but great?

I pulled a few fast ones on them during the ceremony and it just added to the joy and laughter that we all shared that afternoon in the OK Corral.  I mean really folks, I'm not sure how much of a history buff you are but this is inside the OK CORRAL!  Remember the Gunfight at the OK Corral?  Wyatt Earp?  Doc Holiday?  We were standing on sacred ground!  I've married couples in the most amazing places but I have to say that this is right up there on top of the list as the best ever!  I finally gave them the "all good", pronounced them man and wife and let them kiss!

I have very few rules when I perform a wedding but one is that I get to be in the first pics with the new married couple.  The minister isn't the norm, the ceremony isn't the norm, the location isn't the norm so why would our photo be normal?

The ceremony was done, friends and family gathered around to show the newlyweds how much they were loved and then we moved the party back to the Porn Compound!  The DJ put out the jams, the caterers put out the food, the drunks put out the booze and the guests put out the smiles!  It truly was a great reception.  Just a bunch of friends celebrating the love of our friends in the back of a 130 plus year old home!  The party went late in to the night and was like fluctuating crop circles.  All night the groups of people switched up.  Nobody was a stranger there, just friends that were just made!  The over all vibe was amazing!
Bouquets and garters were tossed and caught, drinks continued to flow and finally, the wedding cake was cut and was served in the traditional fashion of course.

after the cake was served and for the record, I don't know where it came from, it was just incredible!  From after this wonderful cake moment, let's just say that the party moved forward in a magical direction.  Every once in a while you would find yourself just about to ask the person walking towards you in the dark if they were okay and then realize that there was no one there!  Ghost?  I dunno?  Drunk? Perhaps!  But it was a good time.

Look how busted up and shot out I am in this pic.  I am bent like a 90 year old man.  You know things are bad when Jack Daniels, Jagerbombs and percocet don't help!

We ended the evening with signing the marriage license to make sure that we didn't forget all about it!  I would have hated that when they returned from the honey moon and realized they were not married!

Leading up to the wedding, I was honestly dreading it.  I was not sure how I was even going to make it down there.  Once there I wasn't sure how I was going to be able to make it through it.  Afterwards all I wanted to do was just crash out.  It all worked out great and as always, I was one of the very last people still up and partying!  Believe me the partying was done too.  My ability to bring smiles that day to so very many people carried me through all the pain.  Getting to spend time around people that I love didn't hurt either.  Sure I pushed it so hard that I have barely gotten up and out of bed since but I've got to rest up, I've got Daytona Biketoberfest to be in fighting shape for!  Here is an example of how hard the party raged, here is a shot of the DJ that I just love!

No he is not leaning down and reading the US Constitution or anything.  That is what you might call, "taking a break" from the festivities!

All I can say is that it was a beautiful day that many won't soon forget!  I am grateful for having been invited to take part in it.  I want to thank Annie Cooper and Juliana Salvante's Photo Pizzazz for allowing me to use their photos here to share this day with my friends around the world!

So next stop for me is now Daytona at the Broken Spoke Saloon, I'll see you there!

Until we see each other on the road,

Keep the wind in your face,
Tits in your back
and the Man off your ass!

Your friend,
Jack Shit

T Shirts! Oh how I screwed this up!

Hey folks, I am writing this to you guys so that you understand what is going on with T shirts and shirt orders!  As you see, on the right side of the page here, on any page here, you can order I Know Jack Shit shirts.  Those orders are processed automatically and go straight to pay pal.  When an order comes in, pay pal sends me an email and lets me know that an order has been placed and the specific details of the order and the person who has purchased it.  I also have people order through me directly via email, or right on face book.  I thought that it was perhaps the economy or thought that maybe people just weren't digging on them anymore or that sales of the shirts had just run their course.  I've been getting asked for some time now about when will the next design come out?  I also have a pay pal visa that is attached to this acct. that I rarely use but it makes it much quicker to take money out of pay pal and it offers me a way to pay for Diane's meds and such that come right from these sales.  I went on line to check to see if a charge was credited back to the account and was dumbfounded to see the amount of money in the acct.  HOW CAN THIS BE?  So I opened up the pay pal acct to find it filled with shirt orders going back since Sturgis ended.....  HOLY SHIT!

As you guys know, I ship typically within the next business day or at the latest two days after an order arrives and payment is received....  apparently lately I have not.  I just could not understand how this happened.  It took some research on my part and I got to the bottom of it.  They say an explanation is just an excuse so take it anyway that you like it, but here it is!  If you guys remember, just prior to Rally time Diane's cell phone was stolen.  She is not real tech savvy and didn't really have any "security measures set up to protect herself with the phone.  Because the MS affects her memory, she saved all her passwords right in the phone for all her accounts.  The phone was brand new and we never loaded up where's my droid or any other type of app to track down the phone.  In a total panic we raced home and changed each and every password to all of our accounts, email, bank, pay pal etc.  Well what I should say is that "I" changed all of these for her.  I also made my email address the primary email for pay pal.  This means each time an order comes in, pay pal sends me an email with the details.  I was receiving these right up to Sturgis.  I don't really have the greatest concept of time these days but did think to myself "man orders really slowed down".  What I didn't realize was and she swears to God that she told me, Diane changed the primary email on the pay pal acct back to the original email address and just changed the password to the new one.  She told me that she did it so that I would not have to worry about it while I was on the road for those few weeks.  Every week since, she has said to me, have you shipped shirts and I responded "sure have".  I was talking about shirts that I received orders for myself through facebook and email.  I had no idea until this morning that she was talking about these orders from the net and through the blog page!  I HAD NO IDEA THEY WERE EVEN THERE!  So this morning, standing on the driveway, we got in what for us is the very rare argument!  She insists that she told me and I can't remember that she did.... 

I AM SO FUCKING SORRY!  These orders will be dealt with immediately.  I have a shirts coming in this week!

I had no idea that you guys had put in all of these orders.  All of you guys that follow me on face book know that for the last 2 weeks now, I can't open "messages" in face book.  I am now up to 306 new messages and it only opens up to a blank page, nothing there at all!  As a matter of fact, I actually posted two pics up to facebook today of the number of messages and the blank page when you open it.  I've called the number someone posted last week to reach them and I've tried all that I can to get them to open, but to no avail.  I had gotten email messages from people saying that they were going over to the blog to order shirts but didn't receive them.  I just thought they changed their minds or didn't get around to it yet.  Little did I know.  So again, this will be dealt with as fast as I possibly can!


I can't thank you all enough for the support that you have shown to both Diane and myself with the orders of these shirts.  I am humbled each and every single time that you go out, take photos in them and send them to me!  The proceeds go to a great cause and honestly over the last two years I don't know how we would have paid for Diane's meds had it not been for you guys, my friends and the purchase of these shirts!  From the bottom of my heart, I thank you.  I'm going to post this here and then post and re post it on to facebook so that people know what happened and get this all resolved right away!  I hope you understand that I am a fuck up, forgive me for this screw up and still want your shirts.  IF YOU CAN'T, then I understand and I'll send you back the payment for the shirt.  You just let me know.  Now that we know about the email address issue with pay pal, this will never happen again.  


Sincerely, your friend,
Jack Shit 

Starting to polish up our little Gem

On the 15th I believe, I posted up about a property that we are deeply involved in the purchase, renovation and hopefully soon, the re sale of.  I was blown away by how much interest you guys showed in it.  In that original post I told you all that I would keep you up to date on the progress of the property and show you what a little bit of imagination, elbow grease and a hammer can do with an old foreclosed home.  Today we took a trip up to the doctor and stopped by the property to check up on how it was coming along.  Right now about 80% of the demolition is complete and the prep work is being done to prepare for finish materials.  Not only has the home taken on a drastic appearance change from the curb but once through the door it has become unrecognizable from its former self!  Well, here, check it out.

Here is a shot of what the exterior looked like when first acquired.

The exterior was refinished with masonry product and is now stucco which

is traditional here in Arizona and will be painted earth tone.

Over the years it seems that the kitchen more or less grew with the family.  There was no real thought that went in to it it seems.  A cabinet was added here and there and there was a built in "china cabinet" that must have been hard to move so they literally built around it.  Very strange!  There was tile in some spots, carpet in others and spots where three different types of tile met up with no real transition, they just came together.
Take a look at this shit!

When you entered the home and looked towards the kitchen this was how it appeared.  By this time we had already chopped up all or most of the flooring.  You can see the smoke rising from Diane's brain working over time.  This was the moment she decided that "THIS KITCHEN MUST GO"!

.....and here is the very same shot and how it appeared today!  One hell of a big difference isn't it?  Don't worry, that crazy oak railing is not going in the kitchen but rather it is replacing the shit ass home made rail outside on the small front patio and entry. 

Here was a view looking from the kitchen towards the front door.  It truly is night and day!

Once Diane gets on that job site and begins cracking that whip, work finally gets done!  She paces like a lioness and the workers suddenly become like gazelles.  Suddenly, siesta time is over!  Check out the difference now!

All of the flooring in the main living area has been removed, the cabinets, the appliances, that old china cabinet and even the walls have been taken down.  I can't wait to see the design that she has for the new kitchen.  She is amazing in her vision for these properties.  Let me show you another view of what this mish mosh of a kitchen had grown in to, it was truly horrible.  Just look at how they built around the cabinet!

.... and take a look at the very same space now with the cabinets out and the walls removed.

In Arizona, they say that the biggest room in your home is your back yard!  We average around 350 days of sunshine here per year.  The old saying here is 9 months of heaven for 3 months of HELL!  Those 3 months are our summer and all you need is some A/C in the house and a pool in the yard and life don't get any better.  The bigger the back patio, the happier the family!  This home had an average sized screened in patio with a few makeshift windows and a swamp cooler.  Over the years, walls were built and small prison cell like rooms were added along the back of the home.  What the hell is the sense in having a big beautiful back yard with a pool and a hot tub and you can't even see the damn things?  I made the command decision that the patio bar would stay!  ARE YOU SHOCKED?  But I also made the decision that the entire back of the home would come off!  This home was going to have one big, beautiful patio for the new owners to enjoy!  Here is what it looked like when we got this joint!

As of today, this has all come down!  The exterior walls have been removed, the windows and screen are gone for good.  No more prison cell!  As I said, of course the bar had to stay but the rest is history.  What was a 16' patio is now about 36' and it will all be open right to the pool and spa!

As you can see, THE BAR HAS REMAINED!  How can you enjoy your backyard without a place to make margaritas?  Once again, Diane obviously rocking her construction pumps is cracking the whip again!  As far as the rest of the property goes, the bathrooms will be gutted and those silly one piece shower stalls will be pulled out and the showers will be all done in tile.  Every nail hole will be filled, every single flaw in the will be made perfect and new flooring will be installed throughout.  The home also features a two car garage that was converted years ago in to one huge family room.  The only problem was that the room was so dark and so dreary.  In the middle sat a wood burning stove which will soon find its new home on MY PATIO.  There is a big ass closet that will be ripped out we've converted a room that I have no idea the original purpose that it served in to a huge pantry and laundry room.  First things first though, we had to make that room more inviting and get some natural light in it so we blew out the center of the front wall and framed in a big ass window.

This was how it looked before with all of the lights on and the camera flash going off!

There is nothing like adding natural light to a once dark and miserable space! 

Yes, that is the stove that will be going out on my back patio.  I have a separate patio all lined

up for this bad boy to be placed!  Can ya feel the romance?

So now you guys know a little bit more about what we do with our time when we are not riding those crazy murder sickles around the country and I'm not on stage entertaining or sitting on the ol' lap top and writing crazy shit for you all to read!  For those of you who did not see the previous piece about the story of this home, how we came about our involvement with it and so on, than I'll hit you with a brief recap.  My amazing wife, Diane is hands down, the very best realtor that I have ever seen!  She is so good that nearly every client that she has ever gotten a home for has referred their family and friends back to Diane to purchase their own home.  With the real estate market being so volatile these days and with all of the foreclosed properties, you need a very knowledgeable agent on your side and as I said before, SHE IS THE BEST I'VE EVER SEEN!  Back in the day, we use to find investment properties for friends and clients and turned them all in to real estate moguls before we began doing it for ourselves as well.  So flipping homes is in our DNA!  These days, Diane's client base is nearly all investors and most of those fine folks are coming down from Canada because their market is still exceptional up there and they are buying down here in Arizona.  We've made so many Canadian friends now and have done so much business with them over the last few years that we are practically honorary Canadians.  Now if they would just let me cross the damn border we could actually go and visit them too!

So as I promised, I'll keep you up to date on the progress of this property, as crazy as it seems right now, we are not really all that far from finishing this home.  I can guarantee one thing, this home will be beautiful when we are done and a lucky family is going to have a great place to call their own and either raise a family or have one hell of a vacation house!  So if you are interested in finding out more about the insane deals that are going on down here, please don't think twice about hitting Diane or myself up with those questions.  As much as I love to make people laugh and smile, Diane loves to find people homes of their very !  If not for you and you know someone else who is thinking about something like this, have them reach out to us.  THE ONLY STUPID QUESTION IS ONE THAT IS NOT ASKED!

Until we see each other on the road again,

Keep the wind in your face,

Tits in your back

and The Man off your ass!

Your friend,

Jack Shit



The Great Disappearing Act!

I've gotten a ton of messages, calls and emails from a whole bunch of you guys wondering if all was okay.  It seems that so many of you have made a place for me in your lives, that when I drift away for a while, you guys actually miss me!  YOU ALL NEED TO SEE A SHRINK, SOON!  I just want to let you know that all is well here with the Shit family.  As well as can be expected!  Every now and again, I just get burned out, pissed off, broken hearted or just flat out disgusted with things and rather than bitch and complain about it or go on meaningless online rants, I just take a step back.  Each of us these days has our own problems, life of late is no picnic for so many.  I've always meant to inspire people, open their eyes to something they may be missing or at the very least, bring a smile to their faces.  I never want to be that guy who leaves you feeling worse about yourselves or your life for having read my writing!  So I just turned off the computer, stopped emails from coming to my phone and took a break for a few days, grabbed my boot straps and pulled myself back up.  I think the thing that makes me feel so disgusted when I am in a dark place is simply that I have nothing to be in a dark place over!  I have a great life!  I share my life with a beautiful angel who would step in front of a bullet for me.  Business has been better for us than it has been in a very long time and for the most part, our health hasn't changed!  It may not be the greatest for either of us, but it has not gotten any worse.  The fact that there is so much good going on in our lives and the fact that we are surrounded by supportive people who love us makes us very lucky!  It is because of those reasons that when I feel really, truly shitty that I come down even harder on myself!  Over the years I guess I have become conditioned to the whole "one step forward, two steps back" and it seems of late we've taken a great many steps forward and I am waiting on the hammer to fall and smash the living shit out of us and "go directly to jail, do not pass go, do not collect $200"!

I awoke this morning having realized that Diane had virtually no bad reaction to her shot last night.  I was so relieved and so very grateful.  I got up and said enough is enough you fucking wimp!  So what if that hammer falls and knocks you on your ass, it's not like it hasn't happened before!  Each time that it does, you just start pushing forward again.  I decided to stop worrying about everything, or at the very least I decided to "try" to stop!  I am going to focus on what is great.  I've decided that living your life waiting for the bad shit to happen is NOT LIVING YOUR LIFE AT ALL!  Fuck it, I'm done with that shit!  I've never been the kind of person who looks forward to things for this very reason!  So just like we learned from "What About Bob", I'm going to start with baby steps!  I am going to look towards the immediate future, not down the road and not at the big picture!  So what does my immediate future hold?  What's going on in my life?  Well for one, it is now riding season in Arizona!  Diane and I have each gotten new bikes to ride, well, new to us that is!  We finally got that bike that we can load up with all we need and ride to anywhere we want to go and I am really looking forward to some great road trips together!  In the absolute immediate future, this weekend I'm not going to Vegas Bike Fest but rather taking a trip down to Tombstone, AZ and performing the wedding ceremony for two dear friends!  I'm a giver, not a taker and I can't wait to do what I do best and that is simply bring smiles to the faces of the people who mean the most to me! 

What else?  In just a few weeks, I will be back in Daytona for the first time in a very long time and I will be once again hosting the greatest Biker Bar On Earth, the WORLD FAMOUS BROKEN SPOKE SALOON for Daytona Biketoberfest!  Being from the east coast, going to Florida was a big part of my life.  I have only been there once since my father died in my arms down there.  Once I moved to AZ, it wasn't just a hop skip and a jump anymore.  There were no more "hey, ya wanna go to Florida tonight" moments!  Back in the day, you could catch a flight from Newark or Philly for $59 on special, hell, sometimes even less!  The Broken Spoke has welcomed me as part of their family and I will forever be grateful for that.  We have one hell of a Biketoberfest planned for you guys!

The Broken Spoke believes that it is about the BIKES, THE BROTHERHOOD AND PARTYING, not about who shows up with the biggest tour bus or who has the most semis full of gear!  We will continue our tradition of RESPECT towards you, our guests and for the TRADITION AND THE HISTORY of this lifestyle that we have each chosen!  If it ain't broke, we don't fix it!  In that spirit, we will continue to bring you the very best in live music, all day, every day.  We will only stop the music to move the party in another direction all together with hysterical games and contests and then bring it all right back to incredible live music again!  This is a formula that the one and only Jay Allen created and it is what you folks, our extended family love and we are sticking with it!

ONCE AGAIN, THE BROKEN SPOKE SALOON WILL BE THE HOST AND THE HOME OF THE INTERNATIONAL MASTER BIKE BUILDERS ASSOCIATION RIDE IN CUSTOM BIKE SHOW.  Yes, you read that correctly, RIDE IN, not trailer in!  This show is always an amazing display of Iron and Chrome!  You don't want to miss this.  Do you have a bike you are particularly proud of the work you've done on?  Well ride that bad ass murder sickle over to the Spoke and enter it, hey, you never know you may just become the reigning IMBBA Biketoberfest winner!

For a rally that is only a few days long, we truly do have a SHIT TON of great times, great events and great chances to make memories planned for you!  When you hear me on that mic talking about RESPECT and that you are OUR FAMILY, that is no bullshit!  We do this all for you!  It costs a bunch of money to get down to these events in these times we live in and the only thing we want you to do is leave with a big ass smile on your face and like so many others, we want you to walk out that door, shake our hands and tell us it was the best time you've ever had!  Nothing makes me happier than when I hear someone tell me that and end it with, SEE YOU NEXT TIME!

I've found that along with not putting too much pressure on yourself about what the future will hold, it is fantastic to look back on great times.  The beauty of making memories is that they are yours and no one can ever take them away from you, ever!  You can access them any time you want to or more importantly need to.  A great memory can pull you up and out from the darkest place.  That memory can bring you right back in to the very moment that you were living it, before it was ever a memory!  As a kid and in to my teens, like so many others, I was a fuck up!  Now don't get me wrong, I wasn't a total mess, I was just your everyday average kid running wild in the streets.  I've heard people use the phrase "the soundtrack of your life" many times and if you stop and think about it, we all have one!  We can't remember where we put our car keys, when the next doctors appointment is or something as important as our wedding anniversary but a song can come on the radio that you have not heard in 20 years and not only does it take you back instantly to where you were and what you were doing but you remember damn near every single word to that song!  How the hell is that even possible?  For me, there was one song that each and every single time that I was about to do something stupid, something dangerous or something truly FOOLISH and for that matter as I was doing it, the song would play in my head.  I don't mean like I'd hear the chorus, I mean THE SONG PLAYED IN MY HEAD, like cuing it up, hitting the play button and going from start to finish.  I'm sure we each have  OUR OWN THEME SONG of sorts, the one song that more than any other was "THE SONG" that inspires, that brings a smile instantly, THE ONE THAT TAKES YOU BACK!  For me, that song was Molly Hatchet's, Flirtin' With Disaster!  The great times, the broken bones and the "how the hell did I ever survive that shit" floods back instantly in tsunami like waves! 

Now you are probably thinking that your pal Jack Shit has lost it?  This post began with me being down in the dumps, to writing about pulling myself out of the dumps and then on to what the future has in store for me and then bouncing right back to the past.  What is the meaning of all of this?  Well let me share a little something with you that made me really happy and really excited. 

Yeup!  The one and only Molly Hatchet is playing the World Famous Broken Spoke Saloon for Daytona Biketoberfest!  I mean really, what the hell is a bike rally without Molly Hatchet?  So now, not only do I get to do what it is that I love more than anything, entertain people, but I get to do it on the very same stage that the performers of my very theme song will be playing on!

So I say if you have to look back, look back on only the good, never dwell on the bad!  If you have to look forward, look forward with great anticipation not with fear or concern as to what may happen!  Life is going to throw shit our way, there is no doubt about it, but if we are constantly waiting for that shit storm to hit, we miss out on so much!  So I say to hell with it!  Let the hammer swing away and try to knock us down!  I guess the key is that if it hits us, to get right back up!  Grab an ice pack, put it on the lumps and just say fuck it!  What does not kill us only makes us stronger.  I say get off your ass, get on your bike and go out and make some of those memories that we can count on later in life to carry us out of another dark place we find ourselves in!  So I guess I'll see you guys in Daytona at the Spoke!  I'll be the guy off on the side of the stage with the big ass smile on his face!

Until we see each other on the road again,

Keep the wind in your face,
Tits in your back
and The Man off your ass!

Your friend,
Jack Shit

C'mon Red Rocket!

I have learned over the last decade that rather than fear change, welcome it!  Change can be good!  So it is time for a change.  It is time to let my Red Rocket go and allow it to move on to another home where it will be loved like we loved it.  My Red Rocket is bad ass... well, here, let me show it to you.  You can click on any picture in my blogs and they will blow up to full size.  In this case the pics are high res. so they should open up real big with lots of detail.

We have had some incredible road trips in this car and made some unforgettable memories in it as well.  The Red Rocket is a 2007 Volkswagen GTI.  This was the first year that the car became available in a 4 door body style.  It is identical in body dimensions but rather than have those really extra long doors that the Golfs and GTI's are known for, they just shortened the front doors and added a set of rear doors behind them.  This is not a two seater that they just threw in some tiny make shift rear seat and called it a four seater, the rear seats and leg room will blow you away.  You can have 6 foot guys in the back and not have to move the front seats forward.  The rear seats also incorporate a drop down arm rest that also opens fully so that you can put a few sets of skis in from the rear hatch.  Not only is this car SICK to drive, it is shockingly luxurious and comfortable but what else would you expect from a German car? 

It was a really sunny day when I shot these pics so the color of the leather is a bit more rich than it appears here.  Oh yes, I said LEATHER!  This car has every single option that was available and then some.  It's a full leather seating package, adjustable lumbar support, Sun/Moon roof with shade, kick ass stereo with 6 Cd changer and Sirius/Xm Satellite radio, all the necessary gauges that light up the most awesome blue, full adjustable steering wheel, computer, cruise and stereo controls built right in to the leather wrapped , flat bottomed, steering wheel, center console and air conditioned glove compartment.  Yes, I said AIR CONDITIONED Glove compartment!  The car features a 6 speed manual gear box and the pedals are set up like a race car.  It also has integrated "HOLY SHIT HANDLES" as I call them to the left and right side of seating positions.

The seats are not only leather and heated but they are like race car seats, when you sit in them, the literally hug and squeeze you and hold you in place and believe me you will need them to do just that when you really DRIVE  this car!  It handles like no car that I have ever driven in my life.  The car truly is a rocket ship.  It feels like you are on a roller coaster that runs on rails.  You can turn off the traction control and the car hooks up coming off the line like nothing else.  In the past, I've owned Corvettes, Mustang GT's, Pontiac Grand Prix GTP, Mitsubishi 3000GT's amongst other sports cars and this car is hands down the baddest thing I've ever driven as far as THE TOTAL PACKAGE GOES!  It really is a well thought out car right down to the auxiliary 12 volt power supply in the rear hatch.  We have a cooler/warmer that plugs in to the cigarette type power supply and we put it in the hatch back for road trips.  We've never had a "family" type car, only "fast as fuck" cars.  Along with those cars though, we've always had vehicles that Diane used to take clients out in.  When we went shopping for cars we had stopped in to look at a diesel Jetta and when we found this car we could not believe it.  It feels like you are in a huge sedan between the head and leg room in the back and the storage and ability to bring a bunch of luggage with us in the hatch back but once you are in that front seat it is quite honestly just like driving a race car! 

Oh yeah, did I mention that the car also has custom 20" wheels on it?  No, I didn't think so.  Well it sure as shit does and they are sweet.  I'm not really the "big wheel, fancy" type guy but they worked so beautifully on this car we could not resist.  Check them out!

So that is about it, the car is for sale and although we don't really care who buys it, we would love to see someone that we know and care about get it!  It's been well loved and well maintained over the last 4 years but it is time for a change and like I said, change can be good!  We are asking $15,000 for our RED ROCKET and that is less than it books out at!  I think it has 78k miles on it, the tires are still good and it probably still has 15oo miles left before you ever even need an oil change which by the way has never had anything less than Mobil 1 synthetic in it and for that matter, the car has never even had a gallon of gas in it that was not premium!   So if you are interested please don't hesitate to reach out to me.  If you know anyone that may be interested, please share this with them.  I will wait a few days before I list it for sale locally just in case one of you want to buy it.  Each time we take people out in it, or we loan it to house guests or friends they always say, "if you ever sell this fucking car, you better tell me first", so that my friends is what I am doing, I AM TELLING YOU FIRST!  Don't come back later and say "oh man, you suck, you said you would tell me before you sold it"!  So here is your chance to own one hellified sick ass car!  The GTI owners are really a very passionate group of people.  For GTI owners, there is no other car, much like Corvette, Jeep and Harley owners are loyal and passionate about the vehicles they drive.  Typically the more serious GTI owners will modify the suspension which makes it handle even more incredibly, open up the back end of the turbo which gives it a few more foot lbs of torque and a few more horses and here is the crazy part, it makes the gas mileage go up!  They also add cold air induction or fresh air induction whatever you guys call it, to each his own and that adds a few foot lbs of torque and a few more horses and yes, even better gas mileage!  This is the only car I've seen where the more performance mods you make, the higher your gas mileage goes up, it's crazy!  Depending on your driving style, the car averages between 25 and 31 mpg.  I have gotten as high as 33 mpg while running on the freeway on a road trip and that was running at like 85 mph with the cruise on!  It really is amazing my RED ROCKET so why don't you put your hands on it?  So as the title of this post says, C'MON RED ROCKET!!!!

Until we see each other on the road again,

Keep the wind in your face,
Tits in your back
and The Man off your ass
and buy my damn car so I can buy a damn panhead!

Your friend,
Jack Shit